The Adult Life of a TCK

I am incredibly thankful for growing up in different cultures.  It's made me accepting of everyone, no matter our cultural or religious differences.  I now love learning about peoples cultures, traditions, practices, and languages.  It makes them who they are as humans.  Culture affects the way you think, your decision making style, the foods you like, and the way you interpret things- even the way you interpret the Bible.

As many of you know, I'm in the process of re-evaluating all of my theological beliefs.  Not to conform to the culture I am currently in, but to burn away the cultural influence I had during the foundations of my Christian life.  Don't worry; I'm not going off the crazy bridge or anything.  Neither am I bashing the Southern Baptists.  I may end up not believing exactly the same as most of you reading this (friends from SC).  Good thing Christ's blood covers all believers. ;-)  You're still going to be my brother or sister, and I to you as well.  :)

Lately,  I've struggled with, and continue to struggle with, staying in SK.  I have built great relationships with people at church.  They are some of the most amazing people I have ever met, truly.  I struggle, and have struggled my whole life, with staying in one place for a long time.  I've never stayed in one place very long, nor have I ever wanted to.  Going to university nearly killed me.  Staying with the same people, in the same place, all doing the same thing for FOUR years!?!  I thought I was going to have a mental break down, and probably nearly did.  I felt so confined.  Not because of the rules enforced by the Southern Baptist university I attended, but because I COULDN'T leave.  If I left, I couldn't get the degree I wanted.  I was stuck.

Now, I'm not stuck.  I can freely move about where ever I please, other than the whole needing a job in the middle of a recession bit...  At the same time, I'm not free.  God sent me to Korea, and God has told me to stay in Korea for a time.  This season isn't over, and won't be over for a few years.  That has been made clear to me.  However, I'm at a point in my life where I want to "settle down" somewhere.  Make a home somewhere.  Not just live somewhere, but have a home.  Whether that involves a husband and children or not, isn't even on my mind.  I just want to be somewhere, that I LOVE the culture, and it feels like home to me.

Korea will never feel like home.  It is quite a homogenous society, and though the culture is interesting, I will never be part of it.  I'll never be allowed to be apart of it.  I am the complete antithesis of a Korean- in my appearance, mannerisms, thought process, or decision making.  I just don't fit in with the Korean culture, nor were I meant to.

This all makes staying in Korea a bit of an internal conflict.  I want to go on to the next place God has in store, yet be obedient to His leaning.  He softly says, "Wait."  I cry out to Him, "How long, Lord?"  He warmly says, "Wait."  I ask again, "Why, Lord?  Why am I here?  Why can I not go on to the UK, where you have called me?"  Again, lovingly and softly He says, "Wait, beloved.  My work through you is not finished.  We will walk through this together.  Stay with me."

Being a TCK, I'm emotionally stuck between wanting to "put roots down," and wanting to stay in the transitionary phase, not really having anywhere to call 'home.'  The Lord knows the desires of my heart, and will choose to do what He sees best.  I'm confident in that, and through it I will wait.  I will be content where He has me, not missing a moment of ministry, an opportunity to set captives free, or mend the broken-hearted.  I live to serve Him, glorify Him, and LOVE all.  That is what I'll do no matter where He calls me.

One day, I'll have a home.  And that home will be in glory with the Father and the Son.